The Photographer Who 'Took a Workday Off' Because of Me

• Feature article •

I went to a photographer because I needed professional images for my website and online presence. I came home with something completely unexpected: a sentence that has been hanging on the wall of my office ever since.

Most entrepreneurs underestimate how strongly the quality of photographs influences their online presence. That was why I opened Google and randomly searched for photographers near me. I found several websites built around the familiar formula: packages, prices and favourite photographs as references.

But one photographer stood out. Alongside all of that, he published articles in which I recognised myself — as a WOMAN.

Although the photographer was a man, I had the feeling he understood the hidden workings and desires of the female soul better than many women. And the most striking part was that I could see that understanding in his photographs too.

Naturally, I called him.

He talked quite a lot about himself and asked plenty about me. He was trying to help me get to know him and trust him, while also understanding what I would actually need.

Then, in the middle of the conversation, he said three words that affected me so deeply that I later wrote them on the wall of my office.

Those words reminded me that most female entrepreneurs I had worked with — and I used to be one of them — actually live inside their businesses like employees. They do not have the freedom to take care of something whenever they want, or simply rest if they feel like it.

Their clients are effectively their current bosses. If somebody needs something urgently, they start immediately. They do what the client asks even when they disagree. They rush to finish everything as quickly as possible so the client stays happy.

And what did I see in “our photographer”?

He told me he worked only on Tuesdays and Thursdays because he had decided to spend five days a week with his little daughter, who was eight months old when we spoke.

He said that if he was occasionally needed on another day, then — and listen carefully —

HE “TAKES A WORKDAY OFF”.

Think about what that actually means.

His priorities are fundamentally different from those of most entrepreneurs. He does not steal time away from work in order to have a private life. Instead, when work becomes unusually heavy, he borrows time from his private life. That means his personal life genuinely comes first.

I had never before heard somebody talk about taking a workday off instead of taking a day off work. Yet that is exactly what entrepreneurship should make possible. That is what owning a business should mean.

Understanding the weight of those three words was astonishing.

Take a moment now and ask yourself:

What role do YOU currently play in your own business?

I would be especially grateful if you wrote your answer in a comment. But even if you simply think about it for a few minutes, writing this article has already been worthwhile.

If you are beginning to feel that perhaps something is not quite right, the following thoughts may help you start making changes.

1. First — and most importantly — look honestly at how fed up you are with your current situation.

The sad truth is that if things are merely a little uncomfortable, if your attitude is only “it would be nice if things were different”, then you probably do not yet have enough energy to create a real change.

Even if you begin doing something differently, everyday habits will pull you straight back.

If you genuinely want to change your situation, you need that deep, almost angry energy that makes you say:

“ENOUGH.

THIS ENDS HERE AND NOW.

I am not going to let clients pull me around anymore.

Nobody gets to dictate what I do, when I do it and how I do it.

I am in charge of my own life.”

If that energy is not burning inside you, the next client call will knock you off course again. Then you will only become angry with yourself for “failing” once more. You do not need that.

If, however, you have reached this point, move to the next thought.

2. Start planning.

Plan your working time just as deliberately as you plan your free time.

One basic rule: work must not overwrite your personal time.

Another: client requests must not overwrite plans you have already made.

New requests — however urgent they appear — go to the end of the queue. Even if the world seems to be collapsing. (You'll discover that it probably isn't. :) )

All right, if something is genuinely a matter of life and death, you can move it forward. But unless you happen to be a cardiac surgeon, that situation is fairly unlikely.

3. In the online world — on your website, social channels and everywhere else you appear — your presence and communication should consistently show a decisive woman worth following because she can lead people in the right direction.

And this is very important:

She LEADS.

She does not wait for someone else to direct her.

After all, what you are trying to end is the situation where clients drag you around on a rope. You are the leader. You are the person helping them through your knowledge.

In other words:

THEY NEED YOU.

Not the other way around.

Do not misunderstand me. There is no need to make anyone feel that you stand above them or look down on them from a high horse. Humility, kindness and understanding are essential qualities.

But you can say no and lead with a smile. Being decisive does not have a negative message when it is combined with kindness.

I know this is not always easy. But if you can see your goal clearly and understand your own value, these thoughts can become useful tools for beginning to change.

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And if you feel that a helping hand would be useful along the way, please feel free to contact me.

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For the professional context and practical side of portrait photography, visit the BANHALMI professional website. Related art series, books and exhibitions are preserved in the BANHALMI ART archive.